Don’t tell me there isn’t a family out there who can’t relate to this. It is a universal quandary all couples must endure, sometimes on a daily basis; the issue of tolerating your spouse’s driving while you must ride, with no authority, in the passenger seat and watch. This sticky situation also rears its ugly head when it comes to watching TV at night; who gets to drive, i.e. work the remote control? You know that is a man’s job; women will definitely wreck when switching the channels, isn’t that right men? Same principal applies to driving a car, bus, motor home or truck.

On the road, when you suggest “Why don’t you go around him?” our silent response is “I’m not matching your socks this week”. Or when you ask “What are you waiting for”, we are quiet because we are thinking “I’m not ironing a shirt for you tonight-you can go to work wrinkly.” Or the old favorite “What are you trying to do, get us all killed?” just equates to “I’m not buying your regular Cookie Dough ice cream next time. Oops, I got Pecan Swirl by mistake, how did that happen?” And we women know how hard it is for you men to sit by quietly while we drive.

We have had our motor home for few years. Before that we did the whole truck and fifth wheel trailer rig thingy. I never gave any impression I wanted to drive that contraption, nor did my husband ever ask me to. Oh, he would test the waters every now and then with “Why don’t you take a turn behind the wheel” or “Wanna try?” without an ounce of truth behind it. So, just to toy with him I would answer with an emphatic “sure” just to scare him.

I thought the experiment was to see if Jennifer can drive the motor home on the highway? But really, if you read between the lines, the more correct hypothesis would be “Can Dan relinquish his control while keeping his composure in the passenger (passive-ger) seat?

While on the first leg of our summer vacation to Padre Island in Texas this past July, my husband actually followed through with his proposition. We were cruising south in our 32 foot motor home, towing our car down I-25 somewhere between Albuquerque and Los Cruses. He was driving and I was engrossed in my book in the passenger seat. I could tell for the last 20 miles he had been building his courage up to get out the words “Wanna try?”. I think I surprised him when I enthusiastically answered “Yes, I can do this, pull off at the next rest stop” I commanded.

With all mirrors and seat adjusted, we proceeded out of the rest area at a safe speed. Merging into the sparse traffic was a cinch. This wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. I liked it and was doing just fine; Dan was not. He was on the edge of his seat and I could see his heart pounding through his light blue golf shirt. He proceeded to question all my moves like a normal “passive-ger” feels the need to do. “Are YOU making it sway like that? Does it sway like that when I drive? The next exit is one mile, you better get off”. Yes, I drove the motor home for one whole mile. Not because I didn’t want to, but because my husband just couldn’t sit by quietly and relinquish the power and control of the driver’s seat. Color me surprised.

Quote of the Week: Tacy: “You didn't let me finish. I was going to say 'turn right here left'. Nicky: Turn right here left? Have you any conception how much room it takes to turn this thing around?” –Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz in The Long Long Trailer.